Delusions of Mediocrity - Your'e Not Special and That's OK!

Elliot Firth never set out to be the face of a global self-help movement. In fact, he barely set out to do anything at all. He was a failed writer, a professional overthinker, and a world-class procrastinator when he decided to vent his frustrations into what he assumed would be a one-time rant disguised as a book. Then it became a bestseller. Now, corporations are restructuring their entire business models based on his words, world leaders are quoting him in speeches, and people have started worshiping his philosophy of “doing just enough to get by.”

Despite being one sarcastic remark away from a nervous breakdown, Elliot has become the unintentional leader of a new movement—one that champions mediocrity, calls out the absurdity of hustle culture, and reminds people that nobody actually knows what they’re doing.

These days, Elliot is trying (and failing) to live a normal life with his wife Zara, his best friend Benji, and his father-in-law Stephen, who just so happens to be a billionaire. But normal isn’t really in the cards anymore.

Benji Lasker was supposed to be comic relief.

At least, that’s how it started. A podcaster specializing in conspiracy theories, government cover-ups, and deep-dive exposés on billionaire corruption, Benji was just along for the ride when Elliot’s book exploded.

Then he looked at the numbers.

Within a year, Delusions of Mediocrity had built a business empire worth over a billion dollars. And because Benji was one of the only people Elliot trusted not to screw him over, he somehow became the financial gatekeeper of an accidental fortune.

Now, Benji spends his time running the business side of Elliot’s empire, investigating the powerful people who secretly run the world (spoiler: they’re just as clueless as Elliot), and reminding everyone that he was right about everything.

Marla Hendricks never expected to run a global media empire. She just wanted to be a good editor.

Then she met Elliot Firth.

What started as a gamble on a nobody writer with a sarcastic manuscript quickly turned into a full-time job managing the fallout of an unintentional revolution. Now, Marla spends her days juggling publishing deals, PR meltdowns, and keeping Elliot from ruining his own career.

She is the only person who can yell at Elliot and get results. She is also the only person who can tell Zara to “rein him in” without getting side-eyed into another dimension.

Marla is not impressed by money, power, or fame—but she is deeply impressed by competence. And since nobody in Elliot’s orbit seems to have any, she has accepted her fate as the only adult in the room.

Captain Bubbles is not real.

Or maybe he is.

Nobody knows, except Elliot—who absolutely does not want to talk about it.

Appearing only to Elliot, Captain Bubbles is a floating, smug, ghostly naval officer who exists solely to remind him that he is failing upwards into greatness. He is both a tormentor and a mentor, a relentless voice of existential snark, and possibly the most powerful being in Elliot’s life.

Bubbles never gives direct advice. He just smirks, mocks, and drops devastatingly accurate one-liners that somehow always turn out to be true.

Zara Mercado was built for this world.

She spent years shaping politicians, CEOs, and A-list celebrities, turning PR disasters into triumphant comebacks. Then Elliot happened.

She was supposed to fix his image.

Instead, she fell in love with a man who refuses to be anything other than himself.

Now, she runs his empire, manages the chaos, and somehow stays effortlessly fashionable while doing it. She is the only person on Earth who can keep Elliot in line— and even then, barely.

Chase Radford was on top of the world—a self-made, ultra-rich motivational speaker with a cult-like following of ambitious go-getters who would pay thousands of dollars to hear him yell things like, “Success is a mindset!” and “Failure is for losers!”

Then Elliot Firth happened.

In just one year, Chase watched as Elliot’s sarcastic, self-deprecating, anti-hustle message completely dismantled the industry he built. Now, people aren’t buying his courses. His overpriced seminars are half-empty. The media is calling him outdated.

And worst of all? People are calling Elliot the future of self-help.

Chase refuses to let that happen. He’s made it his mission to take Elliot down, to expose him as a fraud, and to prove that real success is about grinding, working harder, and never letting up.

Unfortunately for Chase, Elliot keeps winning—by accident.

Stephen Mercado is the kind of man who doesn’t need to raise his voice to command a room. A self-made billionaire with a mind for numbers and an instinct for power, he built his private equity empire by outsmarting, outmaneuvering, and occasionally terrifying his competitors.

And yet, his greatest challenge? Elliot Firth.

When his daughter Zara fell for a man who became a billionaire by accident, Stephen wasn’t sure whether to be concerned or impressed. Over time, however, he saw the truth—Elliot isn’t just a fluke. He’s the most dangerous kind of success story: an honest one.

Now, Stephen has become an unexpected mentor and silent ally, helping Elliot navigate the world of wealth, influence, and power plays—though he won’t hesitate to remind him that he’s one bad decision away from total disaster.